


His Rules

by redabmada



Category: Minecraft (Video Game)
Genre: Emotional Hurt, Emotional Manipulation, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, He/Him, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Physical Abuse, Slow Burn, Toxic Relationship, you have to wait a while for comfort
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-27
Updated: 2021-02-22
Packaged: 2021-03-09 21:01:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 13,613
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27732700
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/redabmada/pseuds/redabmada
Summary: It took me a while to realize that I was an addict, and he was my drug. No matter how hard I tried or close I was to getting away, he would pull me back in again. I knew that everything and nothing would be okay again.
Relationships: Clay | Dream/GeorgeNotFound/Darryl Noveschosch/Sapnap, Dnf - Relationship, dreamnotfound - Relationship
Comments: 2
Kudos: 20





	1. I have a boyfriend

**Author's Note:**

> I don't want to spoil anything, so I will just say that dream and the other tags will come later in the story. But this part I think is needed. Also! this was just a spontaneous writing. I don't really write ffs, I just read them, but I got a really good idea and didn't want it to go to waste. So because of this there won't be a posting schedule coming out soon but I am going to finish this, so you can stay tuned if you would like. If you're reading this, have a good day, love you :)

Chapter 1  
I heard the door open from my room a little bit before class ended. I already knew who was there and I thought about ditching the last 20 minutes of class to hang out with him, but I decided to wait.

Andrei is my best friend, and he has been for a couple of months now. I met him a while back, after I graduated from my old high school, but we only really started talking recently. Since he lives a bit of ways away from me, we only get to see each other a few times a week. I gave him a spare key to my apartment so he wouldn’t have to wait for me to finish class before he could enter. 

Class finished and I immediately closed my laptop and went into the kitchen to find Andrei. He was making food for the two of us to eat before we went over to his friends house for her birthday. 

“Andrei! I’ve missed you,” I said, walking up to him and giving him a short hug.

With a smile, he replied, “Hey George, how was class?”

“Same as usual, you know. I didn’t pay much attention but it’s okay, they all upload the notes so I’ll be fine.”

“Well that’s good. And hey, I hope you like what I’m making! I’m trying out a new recipe.”

“You know I love everything you cook, you don’t have to worry about that.”

Andrei was majoring in culinary or cooking or whatever, we don’t go that much into it, but I know his food tastes really good! While he was cooking, I sat near him in comfortable silence and went on Instagram. I wasn’t really paying attention and started to drift into my own thoughts. I know I said that Andrei was my best friend, but we have been getting close lately. My sexuality was something I never thought too hard about, and I just would love someone who it felt right with. I’m starting to think I like Andrei as more than a friend, he is what I look forward to after a long day of classes and he always tries to help me whenever he can get the chance. More than those reasons, he is a genuinely good person to be around whether you're dating him or not. Maybe I want to date him, I don’t know.

After we finished eating and got ready for the party, Andrei drove the both of us across town. It was a pretty long drive, so we talked and laughed a lot about random things. When he laughed I felt a feeling in my stomach, similar to when you're going down a big drop on a roller-coaster at an amusement park, or when you're about to give a speech in front of your whole class. I truly love being around Andrei.

We got to his friend’s house and he introduced me to her. We all got to know each other pretty quickly since there were only about 7 people there. We all wore masks just to be safe, even though nobody there was sick. 

The people at the party were very interesting. We mostly just talked, played a couple of games, and ate some snacks. I tried talking to some of the people at the party a couple of times, but Andrei would always start talking to me about the most random subjects. I'm not going to lie, it was a little bit attractive, like he wanted me all for himself. Even if it was not how he saw it, I sure did.

We decided to leave because it was getting late and we were becoming tired and we couldn’t drive if we were tired. We walked over to his car and got in. I was waiting for him to start the car but he just sat there frozen. He looked over towards me, but I pretended not to notice.

“George,” He said as he was staring at me.

While looking up at him I replied, “Andrei?”

I could see that his face dusted with a slight red tone as I smiled at him.

“I like you, a lot.” He paused and then said, “Do you know what I mean?”

I wore a silly grin on my face and replied, “I think I know what you mean.”

I leaned closer towards Andrei and saw his face relax. We kissed. It wasn’t a light peck though. It was meaningful. I felt safe and at home.

On the way back home, Andrei held my hand while his other hand rested on the wheel. The combination of the warm, fuzzy feeling inside of me, added to the almost silent movements of the car as we drove, made me quickly become tired.

My memory after this was groggy, but I remember Andrei walking me into my apartment and helping me get into bed. He kissed my forehead and smiled at me. My thoughts slowly faded and everything became dark as I let sleep overcome me.


	2. Who's Clay?

I think I woke up around 11? I’m still so tired so I don’t remember that much. Being with Andrei is oddly draining, but I love him. He loves me too so it’s okay.

I’m planning on meeting somebody in my honors biology class for this project we have to work on. From what I've seen he is pretty nice, but that’s just assumed from what I see on our school’s zoom meetings.

I heard a notification from my phone in the bedroom, so I went over to look at it.

* * *

  
  


**_Andrei <3_ **

_ hey george, i miss youuuu _

  
  


I laughed and rolled my eyes.

  
  


**_George_ **

_ what do u mean andrei? loll _

_ we were literally together all night _

**_Andrei <3_ **

_ hmm still _

_ what are u doing today? _

**_George_ **

_ oh i have to meet up with this guy from my bio class _

_ we have this project due monday that we haven’t started lol _

**_Andrei <3_ **

_ oh :(( _

**_George_ **

_ but I’m free tonight!! _

_ it’s a saturday so we can do whatever _

**_Andrei <3_ **

_ okay, can i come by around 7?? _

**_George_ **

_ yea, don’t keep me waiting;) _

**_Andrei <3_ **

_ i would never _

* * *

  
  


‘Oh crap,’ I thought.

I’m meeting for the project soon, and I still have to get ready. 

‘What should I wear?’

‘Is it going to be cold?’

‘Should I bring a jacket?’

‘This is gonna be a long day.’

I went outside to my car and placed my bag and laptop onto the passenger's seat. The car ride was filled with nothing but silence and the sound of tires gliding over the road. School seems more stressful online. Even though I don’t have to actually go, it’s a completely different environment from what I was used to. On top of that, I don’t have any friends in my classes this year since nobody I know is taking the same courses as me. Maybe I could become friends with my project partner? That would be nice, I'll try.

I pulled up to the parking lot around our local coffee shop and my car slowly halted to a stop. Before getting out, I looked around to see if he was already here. It was hard to tell who was who because everybody was wearing masks, but I could tell he was sitting by the coffee shop’s door by his eyes. His eyes really stood out to me. I grabbed my stuff and put on my mask and started heading over to his table.

Before sitting down, I asked, “Hey, you’re Clay right?”

“Yea, and you’re George then?”

“Yes!”

I smiled from inside my mask, but I’m pretty sure he could tell. I put my stuff down and noticed he already had his coffee. At least I think it was coffee? It honestly looked like straight milk and sugar to me.

“I already have a drink so you can go ahead and order one while I set some stuff up,” Clay said politely.

“Oh okay, thanks. I’ll be right back.”

I feel like I’m always awkward around people I don’t know, so this was going to be rough. But Clay seems like the talkative type so maybe it’ll be okay. I ordered a mocha and waited inside until it was finished being made. The employee called my name and slid me the drink underneath the plastic shield. I thanked them, grabbed my drink, and headed outside.

I sat down at our table and I noticed he was staring at my coffee.

He suddenly said, “How can you drink that? It looks so bitter?”

“What? Me!? This isn’t even bitter, it’s more on the creamier side. And your drink looks like straight up sugar, that’s not even coffee,” I said.

“It is coffee! I just like whip cream. Plus it’ll give me energy!”

“Well, okay.” I said while shaking my head and grinning.

“So our presentation is on the Krebs cycle right?

The project was actually easier than expected, we finished most of it with just final touches left. We had some extra time since we got through it quickly so we had time to get to know each other a bit. Clay was a freshman this year so he was in the same boat as me, for not really knowing anybody. We also talked a lot about gaming and he added me on discord, so I hope that we’re friends. We said our goodbyes after a little bit and I headed back to my apartment. 

An hour or so went by as I laid on my couch, not paying much attention to the show playing in front of me. The handle to my front door started twisting and I smiled knowing that Andrei was here. I jumped off from my spot on the couch and walked over to him.

He reached out towards me for a hug and I leaned into his embrace. We stayed there for a second before he asked me if I wanted anything for dinner.

“Hmm, did you already eat?” I asked.

“Yea but-”

“Then it’s fine! Let’s watch a movie or something.”

“But I like cooking for you.”

“Okay fine, but you have to take home the leftovers. I can’t keep using you for food, Andrei.”

“Alright, alright,” he replied.

“I’ll be right back!”

I plugged my phone into the charger by the kitchen and then went into my room and changed into more comfy clothes.

After the food was ready, Andrei called me into the kitchen and I ate what he made for me. He walked over to the couch and turned on a random movie. I followed close behind him and sat down beside him. I leaned back onto his chest and he placed his arm over me. 

“Who’s Clay?” Andrei asked.

“Oh he was my partner from the project for the project I was telling you about earlier, why?”

“He texted you I think?”

“Oh, one sec,” I said as I stood up and walked over to the kitchen.

I looked back at him and he looked a little bit annoyed. He must have been jealous, but that’s okay. He knows I love him.

I checked my phone to see the message from Clay.

* * *

  
  


**_Clay_ **

_ Hey!! Accept my friend request on discord so we can play together later _

**_George_ **

_ oh yea sure when I get home, i’m out rn so it’ll be a bit _

**_Clay_ **

_ okay see ya _

* * *

Yes, I lied, but it was for a good reason. I was with Andrei right now and I want to spend time with him while he’s here with me. And I also couldn’t just say that I was with my boyfriend, I just met him and didn’t want to make things awkward. 

I went back over to the couch where my boyfriend sat and I got back onto the couch next to him. Some time passed and I was becoming tired and so was Andrei. He asked if he could stay over for the night since it was late. I had no problem with it and I gave him a spare pair of comfier clothes. After we finished getting ready to sleep, I got on my bed and laid down. Andrei turned off the lights and then laid down beside me.

Andrei scooted close to me and placed his arm around me. He kissed the back of my head and then moved down a couple of inches to rest his forehead on my neck.

“I love you, ya know.” I whispered.

He squeezed me tighter as a response and mumbled out an almost incoherent “me too” and we drifted off.


	3. I met his friends today

I suddenly woke up with a jolt from my side of the bed. I looked over to my side to see that Andrei was sound asleep and I could hear the slight whistle of his lungs when he breathed out, clarifying that he was not awake. It felt too warm and suffocating under the covers, so I carefully tried to remove myself from Andrei’s grip and the hold of the sheets. Andrei only stirred a bit from his sleep, but calmed himself after a few seconds. I breathed a sigh of relief and headed into the kitchen to get some water.

As the water poured into my cup I tried to think of what could have woken me up, but I came up with nothing. Maybe a stupid dream. I finished my water and grabbed my phone on my way over to the table. I couldn’t fall back asleep now so what would be the point of going back to that humid room? 

I started losing time while scrolling through tiktok on my phone and I remembered that I completely forgot to text Clay back. I went over to my laptop, typed in my passcode, and opened up discord. I saw the pending request from Clay and I accepted it. I pulled out my phone from my pocket and went to go text Clay. I wanted to apologize for forgetting and let him know to message me when he would want to play. Right when I finished typing, I heard a sudden voice from behind me.

“Are you texting him?” Andrei asked, cutting the thick silence around me.

The atmosphere in the room just seemed awkward to me and I didn’t want to bother Andrei.

“What?” I replied.

“Are you texting Clay?”

“Oh,” I said back. “I just realized that I forgot to text him from when he messaged me at dinner.”

“So you woke up because you were thinking about his texts?”

“What? No, I’ve been up for a while actually. I randomly woke up like an hour ago.” I said in defense.

“Were you uncomfortable?” He asked me.

“I think I was just a little too warm, I wasn’t uncomfortable.”

He walked over towards me and took the phone out of my hands, placing it on the desk in front of me. 

He grabbed my hand and said, “Well come with me back to sleep. It’s too early.”

I just followed his lead to the bedroom where we laid down again side my side, in the same comfortable position as last night. I looked over at the clock on my nightstand. It was 4:10 in the morning but I wasn’t tired.

I couldn’t fall asleep so I just decided to stay there next to Andrei until he woke up. Until then, I laid still while thinking random thoughts. I thought about why Andrei got so tense when I wasn’t with him, or why he would do what he wanted with my belongings. Maybe this was how people acted in a relationship? I never had a real relationship before, just a dumb thing with somebody in high school, so I just accepted that this was how he was supposed to act. I slowly became a little tired, but before I could fall asleep, Andrei leaned over me and pressed his lips to my forehead.

“Good morning,” he whispered.

“Morning,” I mumbled back.

Andrei got out of bed while I layed there, groaning at the thought of having to escape the warm covers. Sooner or later I rolled out of my bed and grabbed a hoodie that was a bit too large, but that’s okay, it keeps me warmer. I practically flung it on my body to prevent the cold air from touching me any further and I headed over to where Andrei was cooking breakfast.

He finished cooking and turned the stove off. I grabbed a couple of plates and some forks and set them down next to him. I watched him scoop the eggs onto the plate and place the toast and bacon side by side. He walked over towards where I was seated and he set the plate down in front of me.

He looked at my face and said, “You look tired.”

“I do?” I responded.

“Yea your eyebags are darker today.”

“Oh well I think eyebags look cool. Makes me seem intimidating.”

“Losing sleep isn’t cool, babe.”

I shrugged in response and he sat down next to me. We ate in a comfortable silence together. He had to leave early since he had to work today and he lives a bit of ways away from me. 

The rest of the day went by too quickly for my liking. It was the same as any other day: eat, do homework, text Andrei, and be bored. At least I don’t have any important things to do in online school tomorrow, so I can do whatever. It was getting late and I didn’t have much to do, so I decided to just go to sleep, remembering to text Andrei goodnight before I did so.

I woke up about forty minutes before my first class started. I groaned as I pulled myself off of the mattress and towards the restroom. The turning on the shower knob squeaked and slightly echoed off of the walls. The sound of water hitting the floor next to me drowned out every other sound. I stood in front of the mirror, waiting for the water to heat up, and locked eyes with myself. 

_ Another day. _

I miss Andrei. I’d have to wait a couple of days before I see him next. A shower would probably make me feel at least a small amount better.

I stepped into the shower and slid the door shut behind me. The water was hot. The drops of water hitting my back stung but it felt nice. I stayed there for a moment before moving to wash the rest of my body.

The shower did make me feel better, a little more alive. After changing and getting ready, I walked over to my laptop and sat down. My first couple of classes I didn’t need to pay attention to, so I logged on, turned my mic and camera off, and muted the site. I was really only there so that the teacher wouldn’t mark me absent.

A notification from the username ‘Dream’ popped up on my laptop. Clay was wanting to know if I could play minecraft during class today with him and some of his friends. It sounded interesting and I liked Clay, he was nice. Even if his friends weren’t, anything would be better than just sitting here.

I replied to him saying that I would and he added me to his and his friend’s server. I scrolled down to see what vc they were in. I messaged Clay and asked him if I should join the call and he said I should, and that he already told his friends I was coming.

I joined the call to hear his friends talking over each other.

“Because Bad, I already started building here, plus you have that side to yourse-”

“Sapnap be honest, your’s is way bigger.”

“I know mine is bigger.”

“LANGUAGE, oh my gosh.”

  
  


‘I didn’t say anyth-”

Then Clay announced that I joined and they stopped bickering.

“Oh hi george! It’s nice to meet you, you can just call me bad and this weirdo is Sapnap.” One of his friends said.

“I am NOT weird okay? And yeah hi, you can call me Nick or Sapnap I don’t really care.” The other replied.

“Oh okay, I’m George it’s nice to meet you guys,” I said. “So what are you doing right now?”

“Well I just started this server so I started making my base in the middle of this like.. Lake pond type of thing? You should come help me, we can live together,” Dream responded.

“Yea sure, what are your coords?”

“I’ll send them in chat.”

We played for about two hours but my class was ending in a couple of seconds so I said my goodbyes and left. I decided to message Dream after and thank him for inviting me.

* * *

**_GeorgeNotFound_ **

_ thanks for inviting me dream _

_ i had a lot of fun _

**_Dream_ **

_ yea! I had fun too _

_ we should definitely play again soon _

**_GeorgeNotFound_ **

_ For sure _

_ I’m glad your friends are nice _

**_Dream_ **

_ i told u they would be lol _

_ i don’t lie, u know how honest i am _

**_GeorgeNotFound_ **

_ yea dream, sureeee _

_ i’ll text u later tho, i have to go pick up some food _

**_Dream_ **

_ alr, have fun _

_ see u soon _

**_GeorgeNotFound_ **

_ byeeee _

* * *

  
  


I shut my laptop and got out of my desk. I remembered I left my wallet in the living room so I walked over to grab it. I had a while before my next class, biology with Dream, started, so I could take my time on the drive over to Chipotle. I grabbed my mask and left my apartment. Turns out, I was actually very hungry, so I found myself walking quite quickly to my car. I can’t wait to eat.


	4. Why do you mean so much to me?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys, I couldn't write for a while because I left my laptop somewhere and couldn't get it back until a couple days ago. And also, writing on your phone is such a pain. These next few chapters will have more moments with Dream in them so I'm excited about that:) If you're reading this, have a good day!! I love you<3

I decided to take the stairs back to my apartment, I haven’t had any exercise in such a long time. As I was nearing my floor, I became more and more tired. _God I should have just taken the elevator._

While pushing open the door, I could see the entrance to my apartment. My door was cracked open, light pouring out into the hallway. I walked slowly towards it, being wary of who was inside. Now that I think about it, there have been more robberies recently than usual. I peeked into my apartment from the safety of the door in front of me.

To my relief, I saw Andrei standing in front of me instead of some robber or murderer. But why was Andrei here? I thought he was busy these next couple days.

“Andrei?” I said, grabbing his attention.

“George.” He replied.

“I thought you said you couldn’t come over this week?”

“Do you not want to see me? You weren’t answering my texts.”

“What- No, I love being with you.” I grabbed his hand while smiling up at him.

“Okay then why were you complaining?” Andrei said, flicking his hand away from mine.

“I wasn’t, I-I was just confused, that’s all!”

Andrei went quiet. Why was he twisting my words? I know I gave him a key, but it would be nice if he told me he was going to come over.

“Sorry,” I said. “I left my phone, so I couldn’t answer.”

“I know, your phone is on the couch by the way.”

“Oh thanks.”

I walked over to the couch to grab my phone and as I picked it up, I saw the countless texts from Andrei. 

“So how did you know I would be here?” I questioned.

“You’re sharing your location with me?” He asked back, almost hinting that I was forgetting something.

“What? I don’t remember turning it on though?”

“I did. Just in case.”

“Oh.”

We became silent for a moment.

“Well my class starts in like 2 minutes Andrei, so I gotta, you know,” I said as I pointed towards my bedroom door.

Andrei looked at me and then at my bedroom door, almost emotionless, and proceeded to head towards the couch without saying a word back to me. 

Andrei and I’s relationship is the first real relationship I’ve been in. That being said, I am not really sure that how Andrei acts is the way he should. He hates when I talk about other people. When I do, I can feel his eyes turn cold and his body goes a little rigid. The way the tension in the room suddenly rises and his words become short. I get it, people get possessive when they are in relationships, but he acts this way other times too.

When we were at his place, and I turned the thermostat up a couple of degrees because it was getting too cold, he found out and ignored me the rest of the day. Maybe he was just sensitive about the temperature?

When I put a bowl in the wrong spot in the washing machine, he glared at me and shoved me back. He said that he didn’t want my help if I didn’t listen to him. I figured that maybe he was frustrated about something at work, and I moved on.

But, I mean, who am I to say this is wrong? Because Andrei loves me, right? Yea.

_He loves me._

Sitting down at the desk in my room, I noticed a flare through the smallest bit of light that managed to get past the curtains. I leaned over to pull the curtain aside so I could see outside. It was snowing, it was finally snowing.

Most people don’t like the cold, but I find it comforting. They hate the winter because the roads get icy, and shoveling snow is a pain. But, the way clouds in winter look as if they are holding onto something, and letting it go as it snows, relaxes me. And how the sun can still shine through the clouds, making the cold look warm, draws me towards it.

  
  


**_Gogy_ **

_DREAM!!!!!_

**_Dream_ **

_GEORGE!_

**_Gogy_ **

_it’s snowing u know_

**_Dream_ **

_wow george, you are very observant_

_where did you learn this skill??_

**_Gogy_ **

_ugh ur annoying_

_i love snow_

**_Dream_ **

_then go outside, build a snowman or something_

_make it look like me :)_

**_Gogy_ **

_u are so weird_

_why do i even like you_

_and we have bio in like 10 min, remember?_

**_Dream_ **

_AWW u like me!_

_oh yea i don’t really pay attention lol_

**_Gogy_ **

_omg dream_

_that's bad_

_and i don’t even like u that much so_

**_Dream_ **

_we should meet up again_

**_Gogy_ **

_you do know there’s a pandemic going on rn?_

**_Dream_ **

_george i'm not completely stupid_

**_Gogy_ **

_well…_

**_Dream_ **

_u suck_

_we can like go to the park by that one cafe?_

_build a snowman or something_

**_Gogy_ **

_hmmm not tmr_

_but the day after, sure_

**_Dream_ **

_so it’s a date ;)_

**_Gogy_ **

_like i said_

_SO weird_

_anyways get to class!!_

**_Dream_ **

_u too_

  
  


The next two days went by without me even realizing it. I was going out to meet Dream in a couple hours so I had to think of an excuse to tell Andrei where I would be going. It’s not like I want to lie to him, but it just works out better for the both of us if other people stay out of our conversations. He’s happier that way.

I’m thinking of telling him that I have to go see an instructor at my campus to take some sort of placement test. He would probably believe that, I’ve learned to become a good liar. I grabbed my bag from my desk and put a textbook and my pencil case in so Andrei wouldn’t get suspicious if I come back home without any supplies.

I love to take pictures when it snows so that I can look back in the summer and remember those old feelings. I wanted to look a little bit presentable so I had to get ready. I picked out some clothes and went to the restroom to wash my face. Usually I don’t wear any makeup, but i’ve always liked how it made me feel. I didn’t put a lot on at all, I put a small amount of highlighter in the inner corners of my eye and the thinnest line of black liner on. I curled my lashes because my lashes have always naturally grown downwards, and I wanted to be able to see my eyes in the photos from today.

When I was about to leave, I called Andrei to tell him I wouldn’t be back to my apartment until late in the afternoon.

“So where are you going?” He questioned.

“To my campus, because of Covid they are behind on their testing schedule which was supposed to be completed like- before the first quarter ended? I'm not really sure about the time frame,” I replied with a small laugh.

“Oh, well good luck babe! Don’t let me keep you from your tests. I love you.”

“Love you too, Andrei.”

I ended the call, proud of myself for successfully lying with no suspicion from Andrei. I texted Dream to tell him that I was just leaving my apartment now, and that he should too so he wouldn’t keep me waiting. I grabbed my old polaroid camera and put it in my bag as I headed out the door.

I parked my car somewhat near the park, since there were no parking spaces specifically for the park. I got out of my car and swung my bag over my shoulder. As soon as I stood up I felt the crisp air sting the little bit of skin that showed around my face mask. I started walking towards the park while pulling out my phone to ask Dream if he was there yet. 

**_Gogy_ **

_dream i'm here_

_are u_

**_Dream_ **

_yea i see u, i’m coming_

**_Gogy_ **

_where are you??_

Dream didn’t respond to my last text so I looked around to see if I could find him, when I suddenly felt two hands from behind me being placed on my shoulders.

“GEORGE!” ‘Somebody’ yelled from behind me.

I was obviously startled and jumped back at his exclamation, almost dropping my bag in the process.

“Dream! What the actual fuck?” I shouted back at him.

“I almost dropped by bag, which has my very nice camera in it, a camera that you would have to pay for if it broke, because it would be your fault.” I rambled on as I turned around to face Dream. He was doing that laugh where it sounds like he’s deflating, he is mental.

“Oh my god, George,” He said between his laughter, “That doesn’t matter because you didn’t drop it. Plus! There’s snow on the ground so it probably wouldn't have even broke.” He said slyly with a smirk.

As I turned around to glare at Dream he focused in on my face and said, “Woah..”

“Huh? What?” I said while leaning back from Dream a bit.

It was no use, he just bent down a little lower to continue looking at me.

“You did something to your eyes,” he said dumbfounded. “They’re pretty,” he said while smiling brightly and standing up.

I’ll admit it, I blushed. But it wasn’t like I had feelings for Dream, the cold air just made my face red, and I also don’t get compliments very often.

“Thanks, Dream” I replied coyly.

He took my arm and started pulling me towards the larger piles of snow further down in the park.

“Come on Georgie, the snow might melt!” He said while tugging me along behind him.

I just let him lead me in the direction of plies of snow, trying my best not to trip over myself on the way. 

“So what type of snowman are we gonna make?” Dream asked.

“Well we can just worry about that bit later, decorations can be saved for last.”

Time went by quickly as Dream and I struggled to create snowballs big enough to be used as the snowman’s body. When we tried to stack the snowballs to create the body, that was another whole mess. While building Dream made stupid, dumb remarks but they always made me laugh. Today was a good day, I wanted to remember it. I pulled out the camera from behind my back and pointed it at Dream.

“Hey Dream,” I said to get him to look over in my direction where the camera was.

The picture came out and we waited to see how it looked. In the picture Dream’s hair was fluffy and seemingly drifted in the air, as he previously whipped his head around to look at me. The element that brought the picture together wasn't the half built snowman, or the clear skies scattered with a couple birds. It was how Dream looked into the camera. It seemed like he was looking straight through the photo at me. His eyes were kind, and pure as if he has never been hurt before.

Even though I'm not able to see what his eyes truly look like, their meanings still show through his weird yellow-ish eyes. For some reason, Dream has felt like a close friend ever since our first discord call. I’ve only talked to him for a little over a week, which is why it’s crazy for me to think about how much Dream means to me.

“Wow, I look so sexy” Dream said. I made a “tch” noise and shook my head.

“Didn’t you say that you wanted me to make a snowman that looked like you, Dream?”

“Hm yea, but how are we gonna do that?”

“Well,” I said while walking over to the pine trees next to us. “This could be your hair!” I exclaimed while picking up and showing Dream the fallen pine leaves.

“Oh that’s a good idea,” Dream replied. “Oh! And we can also put these rocks for my eyes like, far apart. It’ll look like my minecraft avatar!”

“So are we making this look like you or your avatar,” I said while slightly laughing.

“Well it can be both. It’ll still like, represent me, ya know?”

“Okay Dream.”

We finished putting the decorations on the snowman pretty quickly. It looked nothing like Dream to me, but it’s the thought that counts, right? Dream thought it was perfect, and if he was happy with it then I could be too, that’s all that matters.

“Let’s take a picture,” I said to Dream.

I walked over to pick up my camera and we positioned ourselves behind the snowman, ‘Dream’, on each side of him. I turned the camera around and raised it up so that you could see most of the snowman, but also our faces. The camera clicked and the picture rolled out.

“Let’s take another one,” Dream said. “I want to keep one for myself too.” I agreed and we took another photo. I handed it to him while he looked at it in awe.

“We should go to that cafe we went to last time, it’s getting kinda cold and I want some coffee.” Dream stated as he put the photo away.

“Yea I’m getting a little cold too, some coffee would be nice.”


	5. Help Me

I couldn’t fall asleep. It’s hard to relax when somebody with such a fragile temper is in the same room as you. I was afraid of what he could do, judging by his yelling at me earlier in the evening, or how when he took a step closer, he seemed to tower over me.

_ How _ does he know I lied to him?

I thought I was being careful, I thought it was okay. No, I was naive and uncaring. This was my fault, wasn’t it? You shouldn’t lie to your partner, nobody ever should because that’s just wrong. He was worried about me, I made him get this sick pit in his stomach when he looked at my location on his phone, only to find me miles away from the campus, not even parked in a lot. I made him worried when he checked back at my location again, 45 minutes later, to still see me in the same spot. He told me it was my fault he felt this way.

_ It  _ is  _ your fault, don’t try to play the victim. _

But if he was so panicked, why didn’t he drive to my location? That’s the reason why he has my location in the first place, to keep me safe. That’s what he told me anyways. Did he think I was seeing somebody else in more than a friendly manner? Or maybe he thought that I just couldn’t stand to be in the same apartment as him for more than a day.

“You know why I am angry, correct?” I heard his voice coming from behind me and Andrei shifted to face my back. I could feel my chest tighten under his stare, his words barely registering in my mind. 

_ Of course you know, spit it out! He loves you and you betrayed his trust. He trusted you and you made him think that he was being cheated on. He felt unloved and that’s all because of you. This is your fault, don’t try to get out of this. _

“m sor-” I started to say, but the words died in my throat. I spoke louder, “I’m sorry.”

My voice cracked at the end and I felt like crying. This wasn’t even that much of a big deal. I don’t understand why this sudden rush of feelings came over me. But I wasn’t going to cry, I had to answer his question first.

I was too late to speak again when Andrei spoke up. “I don’t want you to hang out with Clay anymore. He ruins you a bit.”

He ruins me? I don’t understand, Dream is my friend. Dream isn’t a bad influence either, he’s too generous and he cares about everybody. But I knew I had to nod along and agree with what Andrei said to me, most of the time his opinion is right anyways. 

I remember watching Andrei at one of the meetups he invited me to with his friends. He was talking to one of them, and telling her his opinion on their situation. He gave her advice and later came over to sit by me while we watched the game on the television. He told me about his friend's situation, and the ‘awesome’ advice he gave her. I remember him saying afterwards that he was great at giving advice, because he was always right. I nodded to show I agreed with him and he put an arm around my shoulder in a friendly manner. He squeezed me briefly and heard him say lowly, “I’m right though, aren’t I? See, even you agree with me.” He smiled and pulled away. At that time, I thought it was just a mere joke, but looking back now I could see that it’s the truth.

“Okay,” I responded while bringing my arms in closer to my chest. It still stung a bit inside my lungs.

“I forgive you though, so it’s fine.” I could feel him shift closer to me and drape his arm around my waist. My breath got caught in my throat, and the skin on my stomach underneath his arm started burning. The pain rushing in my chest was much worse now. 

“Night Georgie.” I muttered out a quick “goodnight,” but nothing more. It hurt too much to think, to breath. As the minutes passed by, they turned to hours but the pain in my chest would not let me drift to sleep. God, all I wanted was to go to sleep.

I couldn’t take the feeling of his touch on my waist anymore, not when it was this uncomfortable. I peeled his arm off from around me slowly. I quietly grabbed my phone from the nightstand on Andrei’s side of the bed, and scurried to the bathroom farthest from my room. I locked the door behind me and paced around the small room. It was too hot and too hard to breath. I had to get out. I clumsily ripped the tight shirt off of my body, but felt suffocated still. My head was spinning so I had to sit down. I pulled the phone out of my pocket. My phone’s clock read ‘2:47’ and I doubt that any of my friends were awake, but I had to check. 

I texted Sapnap and Bad a simple question asking if they were up, but they didn’t reply and I had to talk to somebody before my chest exploded. I hesitated slightly before shooting Dream a text.

  
  


**_Gogy_ **

_ dream _

It was a short text, but he responded rather quickly.

  
  


**_Dream_ **

_ what’s up?? _

**_Gogy_ **

_ help me _

I immediately received a call from Dream and I was finding it hard to keep my breathing under control. “George,” he said seriously “tell me what’s wrong.”

I tried answering him but my sentences came out interrupted by my gasps for air. “Drea-” I tried to breath, “I-I can’t.”

“What’s wrong George? Come on, fuck.” He said while slightly panicking. “You need to breathe George, come on breathe. Slowly, don’t think about anything else. Just breathe, in then out, slowly.”

He mimicked breathing slowly for me and while it was hard, I turned my focus onto just the sound of his breath and tried to match it with my own. After a couple minutes I could breathe correctly for once, and I could feel the muscles in my body relaxing. The call was silent for a bit before Dream spoke up.

“Are you okay?” He asked me, being concerned. I took another breath before I mumbled out the words, “I think so.”

“Did something happen? George you can tell me, we’re best friends.” The thought of Dream being my best friend made me smile, but that was quickly pushed away by the thought of knowing my boyfriend hates my best friend.

“I just- I don’t know.” Dream’s response was silence as he waited for me to elaborate. “My chest was tight, and-and I just couldn’t catch my breath for some reason. I don’t know.”

There was a pause before he spoke again, “Do you know what started this?”

I considered telling him what actually happened with Andrei. I remember the relief I felt after telling him about having boyfriend, and him acting as if it was normal. He accepted who I was at the core, and that made me feel happier than I've felt in a long time. I care for Dream more than a friend should, almost as if we were platonic soulmates. We always understood each other, and we never got tired of the other’s bickering about a random topic or their pride when they had won a round of skywars. I never wanted to hurt him or make him feel guilty, because I know Dream would feel as if it was his fault Andrei was mad at me. I couldn’t do that to him, he just meant so much.

So, after a long pause of me thinking, I said, “I don’t know, Dream. I just had a bad night. This has never really happened before so I was a bit scared. But I’m okay now and it’s late so we should head to sleep, yea..” My sentence drifted off and I heard Dream sigh from the other side of the phone.

“Okay George, just know that I’m here. Anytime, if you need anything, please just ask. You mean a lot to me.”

“Thank you Dream. Goodnight.”

“Wait George,” Dream suddenly said. “Text me when you wake up in the morning so I know you’re okay.”

“Dream,” I started thinking this was unnecessary. But once again Dream caught me off guard when saying, “Just do it George, please?”

“Alright, I’ll talk to you tomorrow.”

“Goodnight.”

I hung up the call and set my phone down beside me. Bringing my hands up to my face, I buried myself in them and took a moment to absorb what just happened. While slightly embarrassed of my little breakdown, I stood up and unlocked the bathroom door, then walked out of it to the kitchen.

I got myself a cold glass of water and I chugged it down. I was relieved when the roughness in my throat disappeared due to the water. I was suddenly so tired. I made my way towards our room, and set my phone on Andrei’s nightstand once again. Not caring anymore about Andrei being beside me, I threw myself onto the bed, too tired to pull the covers over myself. I quickly let myself drift off to sleep, much needed sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys, this one took a bit longer to get out. I didn't really know where I wanted to start this chapter, and what to include and what to not include. BUT at least it's out now. Thanks for everybody reading and leaving kudos!! Stay safe, love you guys <3


	6. A White Blanket

As I opened my eyes I could feel the roughness of the tear-dried skin. I turned over my side to see if Andrei was still next to me, he wasn’t. I rolled over the bed towards Andrei’s nightstand, too tired to walk around the bed. It was almost noon, it’s surprising that Andrei hasn’t woken me up yet. I opened up my messages on my phone, about to text Dream that I was awake, but saw that I had already received a text from him.

**_Dream_ **

_hey_

_r u good?_

**_Gogy_ **

_yea sorry_

_i just woke up_

I set my phone down beside me and ran my hands through my hair. My head hurt from last night, and I was still tired. I forced myself to stand up to look for Andrei. Even though he was mad at me, all I wanted to do right now was see him. I wanted him to hold me tight enough for me to relax into him. I peered out of our bedroom door and saw a note on the counter.

_Hey Georgie!_

_Sorry for not being there when you woke up, you were sleeping so soundly and I didn’t want to wake you haha. Anyways, my mom texted me this morning. She needs me to help with her move into her new house. I’ll be gone for a bit, maybe about three of four days? I’m not sure. I know this is sudden and I’m sorry but I gotta be there for her, you know? Anyways, I made you some breakfast, it’s in the fridge. Make sure to stay hydrated and not stay up too late, okay? I’ll see you soon, love you <3 _

_-Andrei_

I grabbed the note and walked over to the garbage bin, throwing it away. I opened the fridge, but looking at the leftover breakfast sitting in the plastic container ruined my appetite. I wasn’t even that hungry to start out with anyways. I was mostly tired, but I didn’t just need sleep. I was tired from thinking too much about everything, it felt like my mind was running at a speed way too high to be fathomable. Attending my online classes today felt like too much work, so I decided to email my teachers, telling them I got some sort of flu and that I would be absent for a couple of days. I knew the workload would pile up from this but I could worry about that later, my mind is too exhausted to keep thinking about it. Maybe when Andrei returns I could go back to school, at least that’s my plan for now.

The next three days were basically repetitions of each other. I wanted to go out and be more productive, but I was just so unmotivated. Truth is, I was not entirely taking care of myself, but nobody would see me anyways, so I think it’s fine. While I was tired all the time, I just couldn’t seem to fall asleep, or stay asleep long enough to feel alive. I think if people saw me or knew the situations I was in, they would pity me or expect me to be broken in some way. Maybe I am, but I felt sort of okay overall. Once Andrei gets back I’d be great for sure, back to normal.

On the second day Andrei was gone I got a message from Bad asking if I could “hop on the SMP” to help him finish a build he was making. I wanted to help, I really did, but it felt like I needed to stay in bed, trying to fall asleep, or I would pass out. I told him that I wasn’t feeling too well, and that I would probably not talk so much for a couple of days. After that I shut off my phone, ignoring all the notifications, which were most likely Bad telling me to feel better soon, I was getting. 

On the third day I didn’t want to annoy Andrei, so I didn’t bombard him with texts or call him a bunch, I just left a quick message asking if he would be back tomorrow, not forgetting to add an “I miss you so much” after the previous text. He confirmed that he would be back tomorrow around noon, and we had a quick conversation before it got cut off by his mother to help him with some electrical problem. I dozed off on my bed afterwards, almost falling asleep for once, when a sudden buzzing of the phone next to my face made me jolt up.

Dream was calling me? Did he need something? I answered the call after 2 or 3 rings and greeted him with a simple “Hello.”

“Hey George, what’s up?”

“Nothing really, I’ve been kinda sick I guess these past few days but I think I’m starting to feel better.”

“Oh does it have anything to do with what happened that other night?”

“Um, I don't really want to talk about that night. But no, just some flu or something.”

“Oh okay, sorry. Do you wanna hang out again soon? I hate being cramped up in this place,” Dream said while chuckling towards the end of his sentence.

I thought back to what Andrei said that night, about Dream. He doesn’t want me to hang out with him, he thinks he influences me in some sort of bad way. Wouldn’t it be rude of me to just go against his wishes? Dream is my best friend, but I don’t know what I should do.

“Uhm Dream, I don’t think that’s a good idea.” There was a brief pause before I spoke up again. “You know, because I’m sick and all. I don’t know if it’s contagious.” I lied.

“I mean, you sound fine,” he replied.

Why did he have to make this so hard? I have to keep making up lies.

“I just drank some hot tea, it helped my throat a bit.”

“We would be wearing masks too anyways, George is something wrong?”

I didn’t want to go against what Andrei had told me, but that didn’t mean that I couldn’t have my own opinions. I wasn’t trying to be rude, I still care quite a bit about Dream. I still want to spend time with him, make him laugh, take more pictures, get out of the apartment I’ve been in for months. So, I caved.

“Actually, let’s do something tomorrow morning.”

“Do you wanna come over to my place? I don’t live with anybody, so there would be less of a Covid risk.”

“Okay, send me your address then. I’ll put it in your contact.”

“Alright, you send me yours too. It’s only fair.” 

“Fine.”

We said our goodbyes and I ended the call. The rest of the day passed by just like all the previous ones, except this time I set an alarm to make sure I would wake up on time the next day. The night was filled with me scrolling through TikTok, trying to fall asleep, failing, going through my phone some more, before finally getting some brief rest.

I woke up to the alarm set the night before blaring in my ears as I struggled to turn it off. The sun hasn’t even begun to rise yet because of winter. Nobody should have to get up before the sunrise, but Dream was a morning person. I was already used to getting up early to match my sleep schedule with Dream’s, so I thought getting up this morning would be easy, but it’s harder than usual when you’ve only had a couple hours of sleep.

I took a quick shower to wake me up at least a little bit, and to try and look somewhat presentable. I guess it kind of worked, but when I looked in the mirror I still looked like I didn’t have my life together. I covered up my eye bags to seem more alive and finished getting ready to go out. I texted Dream that I was about to leave and set my phone down on my bed. I purposely decided on not taking my phone with me, recalling the events that stem from the last time I took my phone with me to see Dream. I’ll just tell Dream that I accidentally forgot it if he mentions it.

On the way to Dream’s place I got some coffee and bought an extra one for Dream, his was sweet like the drink he had when we first met, but toned down a bit because it was still early. The sun had finished rising when I arrived at the address Dream sent me. While stepping out of the car, the crisp wind mixed with the bitter temperature sent chills through my body. I walked up a flight of stairs to the second story of Dream’s apartment complex and knocked on his door. He opened it rather quickly and waited until I set the coffees inside to pull me into a hug. I leaned into him and mumbles out a “Hey Dream.”

He pulled away from me while saying a quick “Hi” and looked over to my belonging I had previously set down. “Aww, George! Did you get me coffee?” Dream asked. (any askers? -sorry)

“Yea, I was already gonna get one for myself, so I thought ‘why not’” I replied.

Dream grabbed the sweeter looking coffee, already knowing which cup was his, and took a sip. “I feel so loved, George” Dream overemphasized. 

“Don’t flatter yourself. I just don’t understand how people can function properly at this time without at least a little caffeine.”

He nodded along agreeing with my statement and motioned for me to follow him further into his apartment. His place looked rather large for an apartment, the kitchen opened up to the living room, which had a hallway to lead to about 5 other rooms. It was a nice place honestly, there was a welcoming ambience and I felt comfortable. I appreciated the change from the horrid weather outside to this atmosphere.

During the time I spent at Dream’s place, we didn’t actually do too much. He showed me his coding project he was working on for another one of his classes. I find coding interesting, but I get so confused by it, so I nodded along and acted like I knew what he was saying when Dream went into depth about how many lines of code it took to do something. We talked about little stuff that doesn’t matter, like old speedrun attempts, some person who started a controversy on twitter, and stories of Sapnap and Dream acting like utter idiots in high school. We took a couple of pictures too.

“Hey Dream, what time is it?” I asked. Dream looked at me oddly while replying, “Almost noon.”

“Did you forget your phone? Oh my god, you're such an idiot.” Dream said, trying to hold back some laughter. I rolled my eyes at his remark and stood up off the couch to bring my almost empty coffee cup to the bin in the kitchen. 

“I was supposed to be home at twelve, crap.”

“Did you have something planned?”

“Well, Andrei’s coming back from his mom’s place.”

“Well he won’t mind if you’re a bit late anyways, why do you look so worried?

Did I seem worried? I’m pretty sure I was acting normal, but then I noticed how hard my heart felt while almost punching through my chest, and how as I let go of my breath it came out shaky. I paused for a moment to think of something I could say. What was I worried about anyways? Andrei wouldn’t be mad at me if I wasn’t home. I have my own life s- 

_oh_

That was the problem. He _would_ be mad at me, he wanted me for himself. But was I scared of what he would do when he’d get mad? That part I am not sure of. I told Andrei I wasn’t scared of him. I mean, I love him, so why would I be scared of him? Yea, that seems right. Not scared but more… anxious? Anticipating? 

“Uh, George?” Dream said, catching me off guard after cutting through my thoughts.

“Oh sorry um.. Maybe it’s the caffeine?” I replied, knowing it was a lie. Dream looked at me as if he had some suspicions of his own, but he shook his head slightly and looked back at me. 

“You’re really weird George, y’know?”

“Ugh, shut up.”

I walked with Dream towards the door and grabbed my keys and such. We said our goodbyes and he shut the door behind me. I walked to the car but started quickening my pace the more I thought about Andrei. In all honesty, I’m confused about my emotions regarding Andrei. I love him, but he is controlling. I don’t know why I feel relieved when he is not with me, but at the same time miss him, and want anything but for him to go. I try not to think about it too much, it’s draining. So I got into my car, almost falling from the sudden change in pace, and pulled out of the parking lot. I drove quickly down the road towards me and Andrei’s place, racing against time. I tried to keep my sanity, but the tightness I felt in my chest from a couple nights ago started returning.

I couldn’t focus on my driving, all that ran through my mind was how loud my breathing and heartbeat felt. I felt numb, my arms felt numb. I looked down towards my arms, making sure they were still there. Suddenly, I got knocked back into reality when the radio somehow turned on. I slammed on my breaks, knowing I shouldn't be driving like this. I looked out of my car window, over the edge of the bridge I had stopped on. The bridge wasn’t that big, built over a small decrease in land. There was a sharp curve to the bridge though, which was definitely a safety hazard. The snow laid on top of the ground below the crossing evenly. The only thing standing between my car and the depth of ground was a flimsy wooden railing, running across the sides of the bridge.

A reflection of light in the rearview mirror caught my eye. I didn’t have enough time to react, even though the next events seemed to play out in slow motions. The light grew larger and I could make out the outlines of a semi truck in the image on the mirror. I felt my body throw itself forward, along with my car, which made a crunching sound. I couldn’t tell if that sound came from the metal of the back of my car compressing together, or if it was the old wooden railings snapping out of their place, and falling off the ledge. Maybe it was both.

Luckily, the seatbelt across my chest caught me and threw me back into my seat, making sure I didn’t hurl myself through the windshield. The feeling in my stomach as my car slid off the bridge felt exactly like I was on a roller coaster, except this time the drop was not monitored. There was no resistance. I could see the snow that was set on the ground come closer to my face, but I couldn’t move. I only watched as the space between the white blanket and my car closed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Haha yea. Don't worry, it'll be fineeeeee.


	7. My ribs hurt

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey so we are gonna bend the visiting rules for patients in the hospital because I said so lol and because I kinda felt bad for the characters so I did what I had to do haha

I don’t remember much from when I first opened my eyes. People were shouting, I couldn’t make out what they were saying due to the ringing in my ears. I saw people standing around me, moving around and handing each other objects I could not see that well. I was so tired, but all of the people’s commotion around me forced me to stay awake. But the things started to get slower as I saw a kind looking woman hover over me and put something over my mouth. Eventually my eyes closed and time seemed to pass quicker than it ever has.

That was a little over a week ago. I’m starting to be able to speak again and I’m learning more about what happened to me. I’ve been uncommunicative this past week, other than the few things I was able to write down to show a nurse. I was able to write my name and answer a couple “yes or no” questions but my arms were shaky and tired, making my handwriting almost unreadable. I was told by my favorite nurse what happened, as I couldn’t remember the day of the accident. She told me that a random driver had come across a bridge that I was run off on. The random driver saw the gap in the bridge railing made by my car, and they looked over the edge of the bridge to see me and my totaled car.

She told me I was lucky. Lucky that I wasn’t hurt too bad. Even though the bridge was not very high off the ground I still got thrown off of it, so it makes sense that I would at least have a broken bone or two. The left side of my body took most of the impact, which resulted in a couple tears in my muscles, two fractured ribs, a concussion of which they still weren't sure the full extent of, a dislocated hip, and random bruises and scratches that didn’t have any major impact. Still, I was lucky I guess. My left side was my dominant side but now it can’t do shit, so I will have to relearn a bunch of motions. I have a physical therapist for that, and my doctors told me that my injuries in my arm were not too severe and were easily recoverable, so I'm not too worried.

In addition to my physical therapist, I also have a speech therapist. Something damaged my vocal cords slightly in the crash, maybe I screamed for help too hard once I was hit, I can’t remember. But in addition to that, I just didn’t want to talk to anybody. I had a lot of time to think in the hospital, and I started to remember Dream and Andrei and all my other friends. I only really wanted to talk to them and not the hospital staff. Today I spoke for the first time with my therapist, so I guess that's improvement. My voice came out rough and it cracked a bit, it hurt my throat but that was to be expected. After a couple tries of me trying to speak, I managed to give them Andrei’s contact information.

The nurse also told me that they couldn’t find any personal identification on me, as I left my phone and wallet at home, only bringing cash to pay for the coffee. I was glad I was able to speak to the doctors, even though a part of me wanted them to let me be. But I know my friends and Andrei are worried about me. I suddenly disappeared and had no contact with anybody. I didn’t show up to any of my classes and the food Andrei left for me in our fridge went untouched.

Soon after I gave the therapist Andrei’s number, maybe 30 minutes or so, Andrei came through the door of my hospital room, looking frantic and on edge. He ran over to me and I could better see the tears about to fall from his eyes when he leaned over me and cupped my face. He kissed my forehead and pulled back, tears started falling out of his eyes and he fell back into a crouching position while clinging onto my arm, he didn’t want to let me go again.

“An… Andrei, I c-can’t-” I struggled still to speak properly but I wanted to at least try, Andrei was here with me. “I know it’s okay, the nurse told me on the phone everything.” There was a minute of comfortable silence, where he just held onto me like his life depended on it. My muscles in my arms were too weak after the accident to hold him back, so we just sat there until Andrei looked up at me and said, “I thought you were gone, Georgie. I thought you left me.”

I couldn’t speak so I attempted to reach over and rest my hand on top of his. Andrei quickly grasped my hand with his and put his head down, resting his forehead on the leg that was not injured. We stayed in that position for a while, silent, just appreciating the other’s presence. I shook his arm a little and he looked up at me. I pointed to a chair that was on the other side of my bed and he understood what I was trying to tell him. 

“Oh, oops” Andrei said as he stood up. He pulled the chair back around the bed so he could be on my less injured side. He sat down and grabbed my hand again before he realized something. He stood up again and grabbed something from his back pocket and handed it to me. “I thought that you would want to contact your friends at some point, tell them what’s happened and stuff.” I smiled back at him and shakily grabbed my phone from his hand and set it down in my lap. “Oh, it might be too much work for you right now to text them and you probably can’t call them. Umm I could do it if you want me to, just tell them you’re okay?” He asked.

I shook my head to signal “no”. He nodded back and sat down again in the position we were in before, hand in hand. I thought about having Andrei doing what he suggested but I decided it was not for the best. The main person I want to let know what happened would be Dream and then our friends. My parents and I fell apart after I came out to them, so I didn’t think I needed to tell them. It’s not like they disowned me, they just didn’t completely accept me and our relationship was strained because of it. I wasn’t going to die, so I decided against contacting them. And I also didn’t want Andrei to text Dream, I know he didn’t like him. I decided on having that one nurse do so once Andrei would leave. But it would be a while until that happened, so I decided not to think about it too much. I leaned back into Andrei’s touch and shut my eyes for some much needed rest.

I woke up about an hour before Andrei had to leave for work, so he talked for a bit and I spoke back a couple sentences which is better than yesterday. My voice was still rough and sounded off but it was getting better. As for the rest of my injuries, they will take longer to heal. I feel more awake than last week though so that’s a good thing, maybe they were taking me off of some of the drugs I was on. Andrei left for work after we said our “goodbyes” and I waited a bit to call a nurse to my room, just to make sure Andrei couldn’t see. 

I pressed the non-emergency nurse call button and waited a couple minutes for my favorite nurse to come in. I learned her name was Elle, and we were starting to get to know each other. She would hang out in my room sometimes between her breaks, she did most of the talking though. When Elle came in I smiled towards her and motioned for her to come closer by me. She responded with a quick “Hi” and walked over towards my bedside. I held up my phone for her to see and motioned towards Dream’s contact.

“Do you want me to call him?” Elle questioned. I nodded back eagerly. She softly took the phone from my hands and pressed the call button. After the first ring, Dream picked up.

“George! Where have you been? You haven’t answered my messages in like 2 weeks” Dream immediately said a bit worried. Elle looked at me before taking a breath and replying to Dream. “Hello Clay, my name’s Elle and I’m a nurse at Cedar Rapids Hospital (idk guys). George was in a car accident, but he is doing okay now. He’s stable.” I could hear Dream mumble something that sounded like “Oh my god.”

“Can I come see him?” Elle looked over at me and waited for me to answer. I shook my head up and down. “Yes, check in with the front desk when you get here. They will tell you which room he is in and how to get there. Once you’re here I’ll explain to you what happened. Drive safely.” She ended the call and handed the phone to me, then smiled in my direction and left the room.

I wanted to see Dream, to run up and hug him, even though I can barely walk without a nurse’s assistance at the moment. But the thought of him seeing me this broken down and weak haunted me. I was already too open once before when I called Dream during my panic attack. Luckily he seemed to go back to normal quickly after that call, I was thankful. Us calling during that moment had actually helped me a lot, but afterwards it made me worry. I was comfortable in Dream and I’s current relationship and I appreciated it a lot. Now, I am fine with being vulnerable in front of other people as long as they treat me the same as how they did before. The thought of our relationship altering even slightly scared me. But I needed to see Dream right now, and I could only hope for him to be thinking the same.

After a bit of time sitting in silence, I heard the door in my room click and footsteps approaching me rapidly. I turned just in time to see Dream before I was engulfed in his arms. It hurt a bit, but I didn't care. I moved my right arm to pull Dream towards me a little while my left arm was resting beside me on a small stack of cheap hospital pillows. Dreams head fell forwards over my shoulder and he squeezed me a bit more, as if he could possibly hold on tighter. I felt his fingers slightly dig into the back of my hospital gown. Dream shook a bit as he pinned himself between my one good arm and beat up chest. 

“Fuck you,” Dream said with his voice wavering “I was so scared.” His voice cracked when he finished the end of his sentence. He pulled out of our embrace and ran one of his hands through his hair and I leaned back slowly into the mattress. “Sorry,” I whispered out.

As Dream stepped away I could look at him for the first time in two weeks. He looked like a mess, his hair was out of place and his eyebags were deeper than I remembered. His clothes were disheveled, as if he had put on the nearest outfit in his reach and ran with it. But what was worse was the look on his face, the worry in his eyes.

“God dammit George, I was so” he paused “so scared.” Before I could respond his voice shot out again. “I didn’t hear from you for days Geor- no,  _ weeks _ George. I thought maybe you had lost your phone since you didn’t bring it to my apartment but then I thought ‘well, you could just message me on discord.’ So I texted you on discord, and so did Sapnap and Bad. And you still didn’t answer after days George! So I rang you over and over again, no answer.” Dream was pacing across the room. He kept ranting on and I let him, it’s not like I could stop him if I tried. “I started to think you were ignoring us and maybe I said something wrong or made you uncomfortable or something, I don’t know. But it was okay, I could get your attention in class or something but you weren’t there either. I was somewhat at ease when once I convinced myself it was something I said, and thought that you were physically okay. But jesus fucking christ you got hit off a fucking bridge.” He was yelling at this point. “This doesn’t happen in real life George, it happens in dramas- stupid shit like this. People disappearing, getting killed, car- hell George,” Dream shook his head in disbelief. “Car crashes! What the hell!?” He finished his rant and looked straight into my eyes, which he was avoiding the whole time he was speaking. He had been crying, I’m not sure for how long.

My eyes were becoming teary, Dream was scary when he yelled, especially when you’re the one he’s yelling at. “I’m sorry” I choked out. That was all I could say, all I could think of. My cheeks were becoming wet from the couple of tears that fell from my eyes. It was a reflex to wipe my eyes with my left arm, but let out a noise of discomfort when I moved that arm too quickly. It fell back down onto the stack of pillows and I used my other arm to wipe my tears. 

“Oh George, s-sorry I didn’t mean to yell.” He walked towards me and took my hand in his. He was sitting in the seat Andrei previously sat in when he repeated his apology, “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, you don't need to apologize George. This, it’s not your fault. I was just scared, George. I’m sorry.” He looked up at me after a moment, my hand still in his, and asked “Are you doing okay, a-are you feeling better?” His voice sounded rough because of the previous yelling session.

I looked over behind Dream to see Elle behind the window asking me a question by holding up a ‘thumbs up’ sign. I wiggled my hand out of Dream’s grasp to send the same sign back, telling her that all was good here. Dream looked disappointed before he saw what I was doing. After Elle nodded and walked away, I grabbed Dream’s hand again and he squeezed back. I nodded my head ‘yes’ to Dream’s question and tried to respond. The first time I tried to speak, no words came out so I cleared my throat and tried again. “Yes, but th- my throat.” I managed to get out. Dream looked confused for a second before he remembered what the doctor told him outside my room as he eagerly awaited to enter. “Oh yea sorry I forgot, the doctor told me about your voice, umm…” He looked around my room before spotting a notepad and a pen and handed it to me. 

I had some practice writing with my right hand this past week, it wasn’t too hard to pick up. As I started to messily write the sentence ‘I missed you, I wasn’t able to get in contact with anybody because they didn’t know who I was and I couldn’t exactly tell them my name lol’ I felt Dream’s hand lay on top of my leg and he rested his head on my lap while facing towards me. It was nice having Dream rest there, it was like a constant reassurance that I was alive and okay. I turned the notepad around and put it next to Dream’s face so that he didn’t have to move to read it. He looked up at the notepad, tears still evident in his eyes, and seemed to brighten up a little bit. He smiled at me and said, “I’m so glad you’re okay George”. I returned the notepad to my lap and wrote out a sloppy ‘me too’ and showed Dream. He scoffed with a smile.

He told me about some things I missed while I was gone, like how a girl in our class meeting was unmuted and everybody heard her singing loudly. Or that Bad had built small statues of all of us on Dream’s server. Dream did most of the talking, but that was okay, we were just glad to be in each other's presence.

Dream finished one of his stories with laughing and I smiled and nodded at him. I looked over at my phone and realized that Andrei would be coming back soon. I grabbed the notepad that I let rest on my lap and started to write in it again. Dream watched as I wrote out ‘Andrei’s going to come back from work soon.’ I looked up from the notepad to Dream and he said “Oh that’s okay, I’ll leave when he gets here so you guys can have some alone time” He smirked at the end of his sentence. I went back to writing something in the notepad and Dream started talking again, “Now that I think about it, I actually haven’t even met Andrei before. He better be sweet George, oh and good looking! You deserve someone up to par, George.” I shook my head and laughed at the end of Dream’s statement.

I held the notepad up to Dream’s face and he read ‘hmm idk if now would be a good time to meet him for the first time, he’s kinda stressed ig.’ Dream let out an “Ohhhhh okay, that’s fine, I can meet him some other time.”

“Oh and by the way,” Dream started saying “Is it okay if I tell the others what happened? And if it is, would you be okay with them visiting? I know you guys haven’t met in person yet but I promise you they are just as nice as they are online. And they’ve been worried about you too ya know.” I quickly nodded, wanting to meet them too. I hated that I made everybody worried, I felt the guilt building up but I pushed it down, not wanting to ruin the moment. 

“Okay then I guess it’s time to go,” Dream said as he stood up. He took the notepad from my hand and set it on the bedside table. “Hey, call me when a good time to come back would be, my schedule is like completely empty so anytime would be okay. Wait you can’t talk, oops. Umm can you text? Or will that hurt your hand? Oh just facetime me, it’ll be better than talking to that nurse. She is really nice but I like talking to you better. You can just use the notepad, I think that’ll be okay.” I nodded at Dream’s statement and held my arm open to Dream. He walked up closer to me and bent down slightly. He wrapped his arms around me once again, but softer this time. I wanted to stay here, in this moment, forever. His embrace was warm and comfortable, I felt safe. But, inevitably, Dream pulled away and I rested back into the mattress. He brought his arm up to my head and ruffled my hair while simultaneously saying, “Love ya George.”

I shook my head while smiling and took his hand into my own, savoring the last bit of connection before Dream left. He smiled and let go of my hand, then grabbed his stuff that rested by the door of the room. He turned to face me and waved, I waved back. He walked out of the door and I heard him say a quick “Thank you” to Elle who was sitting at her desk, which was conveniently right outside my room, before the door shut. I was met with silence once again, aside from the beeping of machines I was attached to. 

I didn’t want Dream to go, but I knew I needed to make him leave before Andrei got back. Andrei was acting oddly calm for what happened, I was surprised that Dream was the one yelling when he saw me and not Andrei. I guess it’s a good thing though, that Andrei isn’t mad. If he yelled, I wouldn’t know what to do.

I waited for Andrei to come through the door, but it’s been about an hour since he finished work. ‘He’s probably getting food or something’, I thought. A couple moments later I received a text from Andrei. 

**_Andrei_ **

_ hey George, work was long and I’m a bit tired, plus visiting hours are abt to end _

_ I’ll come by tmr tho, txt me something I should pick up for us for breakfast _

It took me a while to type out a response since I was only using my right hand to do so, but I did it eventually. I was getting a bit tired so I set my phone by my side, lowered the bed a little, and shut my eyes as I waited for sleep to come.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi guys, this chapter got kinda long compared to the others lol. Hope you guys enjoyed :D and remember to take care of yourself! Love youuu

**Author's Note:**

> I don't want to spoil anything, so I will just say that dream and the other tags will come later in the story. But this part I think is needed. Also! this was just a spontaneous writing. I don't really write ffs, I just read them, but I got a really good idea and didn't want it to go to waste. So because of this there won't be a posting schedule coming out soon but I am going to finish this, so you can stay tuned if you would like. If you're reading this, have a good day, love you :)


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